Thursday, December 20, 2007

Hockey Bloggers

Changing the way hockey is covered.

A Handy Guide for Beginners: Hockey Blogging

Do not make fun of James Mirtle and/or Eric McErlain. They are the overlords of the hockey blogosphere/world/box/thing. Thus, if you wanted to call one of them a Bat Shit Crazy Son of a Bitch whose blog is vile trash, it's not a good idea. If said event were to occur, you would have huge, muscular guys with cool sunglasses show up at your house in a matter of minutes whose only agenda would be to "take you down" a la Dog the Bounty Hunter. That is, of course, if you were to do such a dastardly thing.*

Always post lots of random pictures of hot chicks, specifically ice girls. This may not guarantee that your blog gets tons of cheap hits, but it will give you a lot of street cred. You're the cool blogger who doesn't play by the rules! You're not like those MSM sons of bitches who bend to the man. You embrace your true self as a manly blogger who enjoys a tight ass or two or twenty. That being said, if you are of the female hockey blogging persuasion, well, I have no idea what you should do. Post a picture of Mike Modano's chest? I have no clue.

Do name your blog in a fashion that tricks readers who don't look hard enough into thinking you are someone famous and enormously egotistical. You shouldn't take more than two minutes to come up with a snappy, irreverent name either. Names like John Buccigross Rocks and I Am Sean Avery and I Am All That is Man should suffice. See how easy that was? You too can have an awesome blog title.**

Do flame Eklund. That's the 'in' thing to do isn't it? In fact, if you have a sneaking suspicion that he creates rumors simply from the banter on your message board, go ahead and prove it by baiting him into it. It's fun. Promise.
Damn. I keep forgeting that rule about posting hot pics of hockey chicks. I just knew this blog has been missing something lately. Man, I better get with the program and fast.

...OK, that's much better.

The hockey revolution will be blogged.

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